'I thought I'd share my experiences with those of you reading this website. You have either had post natal depression, are living with it or know someone who has it. Let me introduce myself. My name is Sue, I have been married to Simon for eight years and we have been together for 14 years. It took over two years for me to concieve our son Luke. During my pregnancy I was very well and excited at the prospect of becoming a new mum.

I had an unpleasant birth and post haemorrhaged afterwards. I was discharged 15 hours later with no explanation or information regarding the care of a new born baby and no medication for anaemia. I saw various community midwives, as my own midwife was away on holiday. Also my own GP was on holiday, one person who would have known what I was normally like. Because of this I had to see different GP's when I knew I wasn't feeling right; very low. In the space of a week I had seen 4 different GPs! I completed a post natal questionnaire where I lied about how I was feeling. I was scared in case they took my baby away though I had admitted I was suicidal - if you are in a similar position do admit how you feel, talk to someone - lying can delay you getting the necessary help.

My mood became lower and lower and I entered into a psychotic state (a much rarer condition than PND), I didn't know what was reality and I had bizarre thoughts about myself, thinking I was naked and everyone could see me. I had paranoia and was convinced people were talking about me and everyone was against me; at one point I felt people were trying to poison me, so I stopped eating.

Eventually I ended up in hospital where I spent quite a long time in recovery. I have had an unpleasant journey living through psychosis, as well as post natal depression, but I now feel I can leave the psychosis and post natal depression in the past where it belongs. I felt cheated having lost the first few months of my sons life, so I am planning to complete the missing piece by putting together a keepsake box and writing a diary documenting the facts, as Luke only needs the facts to know about his birth.

In the past few days I have felt better than ever. My confidence is growing ever stronger and I have more self esteem. I feel I am back in control of my life. With post natal depression you are in a bubble; you cannot control what you say, feel or do. Now I am out of the bubble, I am in control, I can handle life ahead of me and I am enjoying my life with my son.

The way I see the situation is the the post natal depression and psychosis were triggered by many factors during and after the birth. My body was running on adrenaline and nothing else. I was exhausted, anaemic, sleep deprived, was not eating or drinking properly, and due to breastfeeing, I was even more dehydrated - something had to give.

I am now a different person because I am a mummy now. Relationships have changed, as they do anyway when you have kids but I have become stronger and more assertive due to the experiences I've had. Now I want to enjoy life with Luke and Simon.

Although at the time you think your world is never going to change, it does and you can leave PND behind you. Although it's been the worst experience in my life it has resulted in providing the best outcome - to live life to the full.

Everyone should pace themselves, go with the flow. I do not organise when it comes to housework. I do what I want when I want. I go out with Luke, I nurture myself and buy myself flowers occasionally and appreciate the simple things in life. Family and friends are even more supportive than they were before and this has made our relationships even stronger.

I would just like to reassure you that although you may be in a dark place at the moment, there is a light waiting for you and you will recover. The chances are that you are a very good mum who wants the best - whatever our faults may be, our children will still love us.

I am still taking medication and recovering, so pacing myself and chilling out is a necessary change which will hopefully make me a better person."